Earthquake

No fun or funny images of earthquake damage, I'm afraid. I was chatting with our HR director, who had just returned from a trip home to Grenada. As she updated me on all the things she did in three weeks (which I never managed to do in my three months or so there), we started to look at each other to figure out whether the other was feeling the weird sensation of movement. A third person in the lunch room broke the silence and asked if it was an earthquake. I said that if it was, it should last in the neighborhood of a thirty seconds, unlike something dropping or blowing up or something.

Then - now this is really cool - I felt the floor start moving in a different direction. I couldn't tell you what the new direction was, but it was definitely a DIFFERENT direction. For example, at first it was going up and down, then it switched to being left to right. That confirmed to me that it was an earthquake because earthquakes actually have three different sets of waves that shake you, some more damaging than others. This was something I had learned while researching my new school program on waves (earthquakes are waves that move through the Earth's surface and can be modeled like ocean or sound waves - for a fun demo at home, check out "Dynamic Earth - Tsunami"). Even for the earthquake in England, which was the first I had felt, I hadn't felt this change in direction thing. So it was pretty cool. Being this far away from the epicenter (somewhere in Virginia), we didn't see any damage at home or at work. Just some pretty creeped out coworkers and folks in general.

I think the funniest thing about the earthquake was all the discussion we had with our safety manager on staff at the next all staff meeting. We informally assessed which parts of the building shook the most, discussed what we should do in case of another strong earthquake (to evacuate or not to evacuate, that was the question), etc. We spent almost an hour on it. However, we spent zero time talking about the PREDICTABLE natural disaster scheduled to hit us later in the week - Hurricane Irene. Preparations for that didn't really get squared away until less than 48 hours before she hit. But that's the subject for another post.

Birthday Update

I'm a little behind on posting, so this may be a multi-installment post. For my birthday, my dad came out to visit and REALLY wanted to see Palisades Park. So we prepared for a bit of hiking and some scenic views in lovely NJ. We started with a visit to historic Fort Lee, famous for George Washington's ingenious retreat to save what remained of the revolutionary army (bearing in mind that history is written by the victors). After 30 minutes or so of dashing to every corner of the visitor center, Penny had seen about all she wanted. She then proceeded to enjoy her echo in the vacuous and deserted center. After the third or fourth comment from the very bored looking docent, I decided it was time to explore the outdoor portion of the park, leaving Dan and Dad to read everything and perhaps summarize the details when they finished. Outside there was this lovely cart just sitting around waiting for a Mommy to pull it somewhere. As we paused for photos, though, a loud clap of thunder drew my attention to the menacing clouds overhead.

Penny and I popped back into the visitor center to notify the guys that we were headed to the car before the impending storm. They seemed confused by our departure - perhaps hadn't seen the dirty looks or heard the slightly annoyed comments. We made it nice and dry and were exploring the dashboard when the giant wet blobs began appearing on the windshield. With the parking lot so far from the front of the visitor center, Dan was pretty wet when he made it in. Dad, undeterred by the approaching tempest, decided he'd hop among the dry shadows of the trees through the reconstructed portion of the fort. Now, they didn't have the whole fort reconstructed, just examples of some of the kinds of structures that would have been there during various periods, plus the wind was driving the rain into those tree shadows. So I headed out with an umbrella to convince Dad we'd be able to come back out when things dried off a bit. We were pretty soaked from the shoulders down by the time we returned to the car.

We headed off at a slow crawl along the cliffside road. It was a nice enough road, with a little masonry wall along the outer cliff. However, the 20 foot visibility due to torrential rain coupled with the insanity of local drivers still going 35mph around blind curves made it a bit more harrowing than it would have normally been. Dan cruised along at what would on any other day be considered a leisurely 20mph pace through the thrashing and lovely trees. There was one that had leaves as big as Penny! As we made our way through the canopy, there were occasional breaks, where we could almost make out the opposite shore of the Hudson River - perhaps that was a bit of Harlem there, some Bronx?

After what likely seemed to Dan a white-knuckled eternity, we made it to Closter Dock. We always take the Closter Dock Road to exit to my brother-in-law's place. Who knew there was an actual marina still there on the Hudson that you could visit?! We took the opportune break in the deluge to park and stroll around for a bit, noting the sign that said the parking lot flooded at high tide and the current level of the tide. Penny followed the sound of children's laughter to a very nice stone picnic shelter where an Indian family was enjoying the dryness and lack of competition on a rainy day. Penny soon found herself eating jalapeno potato chips, Chips Ahoy cookies and participating in a game of soccer. It was tough prying her away, but she was genuinely more hungry than a few cookies would cover, so we managed to lure her back to the car.

At a lovely cafe at the top of the cliff, we enjoyed burgers and a cliff-top view of the Hudson Valley. Across the way, the wooded Westchester County looked enticing. Birds of prey and vultures soared on the updrafts just outside the window as bicyclists and hikers slowly started to re-emerge in the extended dry and sunny spell. We enjoyed a little walk outside, spotted a skink and some other wildlife, then headed home for well-deserved naps.

My birthday itself (a Monday) was fairly low-key. Dad stayed for breakfast, then headed into the long drive back to Ohio. Penny and I did a little chalking on the front walk, some dancing (she really likes the timer for the Cranium game), and then we baked a black forest cake. Perhaps a bit boring for most, but Daddy even played hooky for the day (taking the USMLE step 2 on Saturday had left him feeling ill), so it was nice having everyone in the family together for two whole days straight. Not a bad birthday overall, to be sure.

Found one!

One of my ongoing stresses in pregnancy has been finding a hospital and care provider that would give me anything mildly resembling the experience I had delivering Penny in England. In England, the default was for my checkups to be done with midwives and delivery in hospital to be handled by midwives. OBs are only called in upon request, for high risk or when something has already gone wrong. When I go to the hospital, I was asked what position I felt comfy in- birthing ball, chair, floor, squatting, bed, whatever I wanted- and they'd supply that setup. I chose hands and knees on floor. Since Penny was already crowning, there wasn't much chance for an epidural, but lots of other options were pushed rather than that so the mom could be mobile.

Here in the US, when I described being on hands and knees on the floor, it was instant shut down from every care provider I talked to. The floor is dirty- no duh, they didn't have me down on the linoleum! Having gone to see a high risk doctor, some midwives wouldn't even consider taking me on because they ONLY deal with low risk deliveries. Most midwives here seem to do home deliveries or simply assist with ye standard in a bed deliveries.

I really wanted to stay on Staten Island for delivery since Penny seemed pretty fast, but my hospital options were limited (two hospitals). The rooms in my nearest hospital were so small, Dan would have had to stand through the whole delivery because there was no room beside the bed for a chair, let alone room for me to walk. The doctor I was seeing didn't work at the other one, plus I don't feel like going back to where we lost Augustine - not that it was their fault, but the big delivery room is exactly the room where I delivered last time. Plus I don't want to risk running into the less than stellar bedside manner of my former care providers in that scene.

So I broadened my search to Brooklyn. I emailed the one- uno- free standing birth center in the city to see if they knew someone who would give me their style of delivery in a hospital setting. The birth center makes me a little nervous because I want to be able to shout and get an OB. There, you have to drive yourself to the hospital if things aren't going to plan. They were kind enough to refer me to two midwife practices- one that takes my insurance and another that will work out an out of pocket payment plan for delivery costs (that doesn't include all the hospital and other peripheral costs). Since we're not made of money I went to the one who takes our insurance.

The midwife I met with seems very reasonable and nice. She didn't listen much, but tried to provide an overview of their experience and philosophy. Their practice has worked at NY Methodist Hospital for around two decades. When they're not being midwives, they're labor and delivery nurses at this hospital, so they're well-integrated into the culture there. They know which staff mmatch their philosophy and which to avoid. They consult on cases like mine with the chief of labor and delivery, so they've got reliable backup in case something comes up. They reviewed my history before they agreed to take me on. The major condition they imposed was that I had to go on baby aspirin immediately. I'm not thrilled about that because there are potential risks, especially later on, but it's minimally invasive as things go.

I get to go for lots of regular sonograms to check fluid levels and growth, but that likely would have been true for whoever I saw from this point in the pregnancy. Just stuff to be on the safe side. It cuts into reserving my time to spend with the baby when she comes, which is frustrating. I don’t have much to begin with. But what can I do? I'm back in the US where our system doesn't value having parents raise kids instead of daycare doing it. I've already been told that I can't exceed three months off, even with unpaid leave. Bit of a ripoff, if you ask me. Especially since a coworker got unpaid leave so she could stay with her baby for six months. Not sure why I get the shaft. Maybe when the HR director gets back from her month long vacation I can ask her.

So I've at least found care providers who seem aligned with what I want and potentially a hospital I can live with. I haven't figured out when to leave work or how long because it all seems to short compared to the time I had with penny. I can't fathom commuting to Brooklyn with a little one at home who's not sleeping through the night. Not to mention that my commute is so long i'd have to feed or pump immediately on either end of it. Something about the whole process seems very wrong indeed. Why is our system so designed to make women miserable? Why can't I have the fulfillment of gainful employment AND of taking a bit of time off to welcome a new family member?

posted from Bloggeroid

Where in the World is Dan this Week?

It occurs to me that even though he's one of the most important people in our lives, Dan doesn't really show up in my blog all that often. With some determination and plenty of good studying, he finished up his third year of medical school last week. Woohoo!

The PLAN was for him to take off the two weeks between his academic years to study and take the next step in his licensing exams, the step 2 of the USMLE. However, due to flooding at the test center in Chicago, the testing folks canceled his appointment and have promised to fit him in at one of the other eight testing centers some time between now and the new year. Ummm... yeah, not the greatest of news. For whatever reason, NYC is not one of the testing centers so as it stands whenever someone cancels anywhere else in the country, he needs to be at the top of his game and ready to pay an exorbitant fee to fly at the last second to wherever to take the test. He's a student and must start his fourth year rotations, where he doesn't get sick days or anything, so he'll catch grief when he takes off to take his test. Plus, as a foreign medical student, he's at a bit of a disadvantage to the folks who attend schools here in the US. He thought perhaps some really good test scores would help him as he headed into interviews with potential residencies. Those interviews start as early as September, but should be pretty much done by January or so (I think). So much for having those nice scores under his belt when he shows up.

Now, since the reasoning behind the time off was creamed, he contemplated just starting fourth year a bit early and maybe being able to take off those two weeks later. But, thankfully, he decided that everybody needs a break some time. It's true, right?! So he has been interspersing studying with some down time. Among his many pursuits, he has brought out some of his Lego collection and enjoyed recreating scenes from various movies. Here we see the emporer greeting his troops. His conclusion from setting up - either he needs a lot more troops or a smaller baseplate to arrange them upon. I voted for the latter, but I don't know if my voice was heard over the music.

So it has been fun having him around a bit more for a short while...even contemplating the occasional excursion or night out. We have mostly enjoyed nights in so far, but even that is a more than welcome change of pace. There may have been a higher proportion of baking projects occurring in the house over the past week to encourage such behavior. But he has recently restarted his gym membership, so that all works out just fine. I believe this opportunity has brought home the extent of the collection and the daunting task of finding the right venue for sharing it with others - we're going to HAVE to have a whole room for where these go. Someday.