Parking

Parking in New York has some essential differences from parking elsewhere in the U.S. For starters, parking in Manhattan is more expensive than anywhere else I've seen. It is totally feasible to find a garage that charges $20/hour in midtown. You can find cheaper in other neighborhoods, but do be careful in your choices. The most fun parking garages are fully automated vertical storage units - no pics for you, I'm afraid, but it's sort of like the door sorting scene in Monsters, Inc. Paying for a parking space in your condo or apartment would probably cost similar to the rent for an apartment in most other cities.

As you can imagine, this means many people park on the street. You may recall me mentioning that being a problem during our repeated heavy snowfalls - big piles of snow at the sides of the roads eliminated street parking almost entirely for January and February. Even the birthing center we checked out in Brooklyn only had street parking. Can you imagine circling the block while in labor: "Wait [pant pant pant] there's one! Rats! Another stupid hydrant. There!! [pant pant] What on earth is that loading dock for?!!! This kid isn't going to wait much longer. [pant pant pant] Just drop me off at the door or something already!!!"

When parking in New York, it is crucial to have a precise feel for the size and capabilities of your vehicle because at some point you are going to be required to park in a space that looks no bigger than your car. When you encounter that space of last resort, you will need to employ a set of parking skills that can only legitimately be perfected here in New York - the nudge. Signal your claim on the space as soon as possible. Position your vehicle perfectly to back into your space, check for traffic and swing in as quickly as possible to secure your claim. Now that your tail is in, you should have a solid claim. Edge your way back from here quite slowly: your goal is to slip into the space so gradually that when you nudge the car behind you it is so gentle as to prevent the car's alarm from sounding. Usually, you'll get an extra inch or three of rollback from the rear car. Now you can adjust your wheels and edge closer to the curb in the forward direction, again proceeding slowly so that your nudge of the car in front of you doesn't set off their alarm either. A skilled New York parker can manage this with just one or two nudges, depending on the size of the space. Lest you think I'm totally making this up, take a look at New York bumpers some time. These are a couple in my neighborhood who put special protective devices on their bumpers to protect them. I've also seen giant metal grills (a deterrent against nudges, to be sure), welcome mats and other more creative protective devices.

Whew! You have made it safely into your spot. That's a real test of nerves. You can now prepare your car to be parked. Make sure anything of value is tucked out of sight - CDs, spare change, jack for iPod, candy bars, anything that might look even mildly interesting to a passerby. Dan prefers to keep the car a "carry in, carry out" facility - it is completely empty as a baseline. He usually tosses in the trunk anything we won't carry while we are out of the car. You may choose to use a club (a funny metal stick that locks into your steering wheel so the car can't turn and escape from your parking spot). Check the mirror on your car and those on the cars around you. I always wondered why the side mirrors folded in, but now I know. If the road is narrow or traffic moves too fast for your taste, fold those babies in. Get your money ready. Note your time and location.

Now you can check for traffic and find some way to get from your door to the sidewalk (can't walk between your cars because it's just too darned small a space, remember?). No meter - awesome! Wrongo. Check up and down the entire block: there is likely a parking vending machine somewhere on the curb. The City discovered long ago that it's quicker and easier to empty one machine for the block than a million little meters. Plus, meters couldn't hold the amount of cash you are about to drop to park here for a bit. Go to the machine, put in a boatload of money and it will spit out a little ticket to stick inside your windshield indicating your suggested time of departure. The city is currently in a budget crisis, so you better believe they'll be checking those parking slips and distributing tickets with alacrity. Now, at long last, you can head to your destination.

This is one of the many reasons I prefer to take public transit whenever I travel to the other boroughs.